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judy02
03-25-2015, 06:04 PM
Hi,

really sorry but would really appreciate extra prayers right now. I feel I desperately need them.

I've had an awful day. Bascially what has been mounting up since November has hit a peak today. I am basically being bullied at work by one of the doctors there (and I don't like to use that word lightly!) I hate seeing myself as a helpess victim. The complaints about me are pathetic, and are either non-existent or so ridiculously petty and are slight admin errors that everyone makes, yet I am targetted. The manager does not deal with this very well. She never speaks to you personally, she sends short, blunt snotty emails, doesn't address you personally, and doesn't bother to investigate the facts and whether a complaint about you is valid, or accurate or correct. I do understand of course as well that she doesn't want to upset the doctors too much for fear of losing her job. Anyway, things have been building up for ages, I finally broke down in tears today whilst a manager was firing off her riduclous emails at me, and told a trusted colleague I just couldn't work or stay here anymore. It's all become too much.

The good news is, that I have been offered a new job at our local hospital and I am hoping so much that it is better than where I am right now. But it is pending references and a CRB check, but they did say they could probably start me on a temporary basis before that was through. I spoke to the manager a week back who is happy to give me a reference, but I want to be out of there so badly now!

Please pray I get to leave sooner rather than later, that I find a job that is a nicer, happier place to work, and I desperately need wisdom on how to handle this and the way the manager and this individual doctor are behaving towards me. This is the worst place I have ever, ever worked :( And it used to be a nice place. I have colleagues who will stick up for me and back me up thankfully, they don't like it there anymore either. But I have no real representation, no union and I feel on my own, it is really really not a nice feeling.

Prayers for strength please. And just a feeling of God's love, today has really taken it out of me :( I've felt the most upset, angry and pretty much every negative emotion you can think of today more than I have in a very long time. They treat admin staff there horribly *Sigh*

mina
03-25-2015, 06:08 PM
:hug: praying

snooch
03-25-2015, 06:44 PM
I'm so sorry! Praying for you and for this new job opportunity. :hug:

judy02
03-25-2015, 08:08 PM
Thanks, I've never had to deal with nastiness to this intensity at work before. It is horrible and extremely upsetting and stressful.
As soon as they have provided a reference for my current job, I am very tempted to sign myself off sick from work with stress. That's how bad it's become. It's just horrible, and will be so hard dragging myself in tomorrow. Even another colleague agreed that what they are doing is bullying.

DIANAC
03-25-2015, 08:26 PM
Praying for you, dear! Praying for wisdom, quite strength and endurance.
Many years ago I was in your shoes, dear. I had more enemies, than friends. Sometimes, you need to leave, but sometimes you need to persevere. In my case I had to persevere and God gave me strength..

Praying for peace for you.

judy02
03-25-2015, 09:10 PM
Thanks Diana, I think it is way beyond that point now! :( I have peservered for far too long now. This is making me ill and will destroy me eventually if I stay. It is extremely toxic. I do not normally give in easily but I recognise and know when it's wise to go. I won't win there. He's a doctor and he can use his professional position to "win" and be believed more than me. There is no-one with any real standing who will fight for me there. It's just a huge exposure of the corrupt and injust system of a hierarchical business world. In their world, you're not equal and how they can get away with treating you is just...awful. Sickening and awfull!!

I just don't know what to do for the best. Whether to sign myself off sick with stress now, or check I've had a reference provided first then signed off. I can't face going back there, the thought fills me with anxiety and dread. I dread every e-mail that pops up.

I know what exactly that doctor is playing at. He wants to nitpick every little thing I do, until it appears that there is something "wrong" with my performance and he has an excuse to pressure the manager to let me go. I don't know what his problem is, but he obviously wants me gone and his nasty little games are obvious.

It's 1:10am and I still can't stop crying. (And I don't switch on the water works easily!! I think I cry a lot less than most women). I doubt I will get much sleep and just don't know what to do for the best. But I don't want to go back there. :(

DIANAC
03-25-2015, 09:53 PM
I am praying that God calms your heart. Morning will bring some clarity.
What do your co-workers think? is there anyone in Personnel that you can talk to?
God is bigger than this situation. He will show you what to do.

judy02
03-25-2015, 10:08 PM
We don't have a HR Dept or Personnel - the company is too small :( Just a bad manager.

My co-workers feel sorry for me, and think I am being bullied there, and that I need to get out. One person said I am too young to be spending years in there, being upset and one person told me if she was my age, she wouldn't still be working there. I don't give up easily, and this is a horrible way to have to leave, but don't have a lot of choice. This job was never meant to be a long-term arrangement anyway.

DIANAC
03-25-2015, 10:51 PM
OK. If you are led to leave, God will open doors for you.
You will have more clarity in the morning. Just trust Him. Because whatever is the answer to your situation, in Heavenlies it's a done deal!!!

DIANAC
03-25-2015, 10:51 PM
Try to get some sleep.

Kehaar
03-26-2015, 10:34 AM
Sorry, didn't see this until today :( I'm praying for you and hope you're doing a lot better today. It's a horrible situation to be in but try and focus on the positives - you are getting out of there, your new work place are clearly keen to have you as they've offered to start you early. Have you even got any annual leave you could take to give you a break from the place until your new work starts?

Congratulations on your new job too. I hope you can get started soon! x

purple
03-26-2015, 01:37 PM
Only now seeing this Jude, I'm so sorry. Bullying at work is horrid to deal with.

If it were me, I'd get the reference and then get signed off. It is not worth your long term health. Kehaar's suggestion of taking any annual leave you might have is a good idea too.

Hope you can get to the new job soon, praying for you xx

Virginia
03-26-2015, 05:17 PM
Praying for you! I know it'll all work out soon.

judy02
03-26-2015, 06:45 PM
Thanks everyone, a little bit calmer today. I was really emotional yesterday and couldn't think too straight :/

Bit better on that front today, just extremely tired :)

I will try and ring the hospital on Monday to see if they succeeded in getting a reference.

This is the first time I have ever been the victim of nasty bullying like this :/ And I may have to try and be better at dealing with it over time.

Anyway, thanks though everyone.

GM
03-27-2015, 01:21 AM
Keeping you in prayer. :)

mum2only1
03-27-2015, 02:23 AM
Sounds like both you and that doctor need prayer. You need prayer for strength and peace. He needs prayer for a softened heart. How can a doctor act in this manner? Wonder what his patients think of him? Is there anyone you can complain to when you leave? Your boss needs to step up to the plate and say something on your behalf. How can there be no HR? That is just weird. I've never heard such a thing.

judy02
03-27-2015, 09:56 AM
Sounds like both you and that doctor need prayer. You need prayer for strength and peace. He needs prayer for a softened heart. How can a doctor act in this manner? Wonder what his patients think of him?[/QUOTE]

His patients go on about how lovely he is and how much they like him. He is extremely two faced and a back stabber. And very good at turning on the charm. I am not the first person he has done it to, but I am the one getting it particularly bad from him at the moment. The more I am thinking of it, the more I am wondering how dangerous he actually is and how nasty he can become. I am wondering if he has done it at some point in the past before to others.

Is there anyone you can complain to when you leave?

Your boss needs to step up to the plate and say something on your behalf.

Not really. Our boss is probably weak and doesn't deal with complaints very well. She takes the doctor's word for it and knee jerk reacts. She doesn't give you a chance to hear what you have to say.

[/QUOTE]How can there be no HR? That is just weird. I've never heard such a thing.[/QUOTE]

It is only a very small company :)

judy02
03-27-2015, 11:45 AM
Some good news anyway. I checked and found out today that both references have gone through, my new boss to be said the references were really good, and they are looking forward to me starting. I am just waiting on the paperwork now from HR which new manager is chasing. They are looking forward to me starting really soon too, so hopefully not long to go now. That has cheered me up a bit for the weekend

purple
03-27-2015, 05:12 PM
That is the best news ever! I'm really relieved for you Jude! Onward and upward!

judy02
03-27-2015, 06:00 PM
Thank you Lydia! :) I am so thankful also.

I am hoping this music video will accuretely describe my future working life - :P https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIj-6fr2SlI